What is your current occupation? Do you enjoy it?
I currently work at Genie building boom lifts. Its alright for now. It doesn't pay the best but there are a lot of asian girls there which makes going to work ALMOST enjoyable.
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What is your educational background? Are you currently in school?
I dropped out of high school because they don't teach you anything you will ever use in the real world. They should be teaching kids how to manage their credit or budget their money each month. Shit that will save you from being fucked in the future.
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Describe your lifestyle and current relationship status:
I'm single as fuck and loving it. I wouldn't mind a little something to cuddle with every now and then. But I must warn you, I'm a dry humper. You would wake up to me completely asleep humpin the fuck out of your thigh. I mean no harm.
My lifestyle is pretty basic. I'm a punk at heart. I have a mohawk and listen to a lot of Anti-Flag and punk rock in general.
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Do you have any vices (smoking/drinking/etc)? Describe:
I smoke. I've tried to quit only to realize I truly don't want to quit. Its a very social drug and I like that.
I drink but I'm not an alcoholic. The amount I drink depends on how soon I know I'm getting laid or not. If I know I'm getting laid early in the night, I will have one or two so I can still perform worth a fuck later. If I find out at the end of the night, I will usually be too drunk to fuck and go home and beat my dick like it owes me money.
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Do you have any "heroes" in your life or your work? Describe:
George Carlin and Doug Stanhope are my heroes. They are both gifted comedians in their own right.
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Do you have a favorite quotation? Enter it here:
"Look, there's a space alien."
"Yeah, we better have sex with each other."
"Men in Black II: Who have sex with each other" from the movie "Dirty Work."
"Knee-deep in a whole lot of 'why not?'"
David Fielding
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What makes you happy? Why?
Vagina. Kittens. Feminists. Whores. My family. My friends. People who want to argue. Fat chicks at fast food restaurants. Obese children. "Over-zealous" police officers. Giving it a tug.
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What makes you sad? Why?
Penis'. Children. The Special Olympics. ASPCA commercials. Sold out of my favorite whacking lotion. Asian drivers. Emo's.
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Name five (5) items you can't live without:
Energy drinks, hot asian girls, hot black girls, hot spanish girls and my tiny genitals.
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Describe your most "humbling" moment:
When I officially out-shot Peter North.
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Do you have favorite type of music? Favorite bands or singers?
Punk rock and metal are my two favorites. Rap is pussy. A bunch of rich guys talking about the ghetto. Honestly. Shut the fuck up. R&B is gay especially when listened to by a car-full of guys. I like Armin Van Buuren when it comes to techno and Astral Projection. Thats about it.
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What type of films do you enjoy? Please give some examples:
Comedies and CHEESY horror flicks. Evil Dead one and two, Young Frankenstein, Spaceballs, Clerks... Do I really need to name fucking movies?
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Do you enjoy television? Which programs?
Television is homo. Reality T.V. is the worst idea ever and only those devoid of any mental signifigance watch them. Scrubs is pretty dope, however.
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Do you like to read? If so, what books have you enjoyed recently?
This may sound boring but I read mostly philosophy and real estate/investing literature.
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Do you follow sports? Which teams are you interested in?
I watch football if the Hawks are playing. Other than that, not really.
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Do you have any hobbies or other interests? Describe:
I honestly do masturbate a lot. There is nothing better to do in Washington.
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Where are your favorite places? Where would you like to go most?
Japan is among my favorite places. I have been there and out of all the hot Japanese women, I ended up dating a Filipino of all things. Aint that some shit?
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